Question: What are some good games to play on a date? It’s been recommended to me to bring along a game in order to enhance conversation on dates. What do you suggest based on experience? Answer: Admittedly, I am not particularly well-versed in the dating games du jour. Nevertheless, as a general rule, I would...Read More
Making the Call: Preparedness and Efficiency In the previous segments of this series, we discussed how to choose references for a shidduch resume and reviewed the skills necessary to be an effective and helpful reference. In this final segment of the series, we will consider those making the shidduch call and how one can successfully...Read More
Question: Girls are often taught to ask boys they are dating if they have a rebbi they are close to. Sometimes, they pose this question as early on as the very first date. We all know that having a rebbi is indeed important. However, a bachur who attends a large, mainstream yeshiva, where the rebbi-to-talmid ratio exceeds 20:1, and hasn’t experienced any major problems...Read More
Question: My only son (after three girls) is coming home from yeshiva in Eretz Yisroel for Pesach. He very much wants to begin shidduchim. My daughters did get some shidduch prep in seminary. Unfortunately, most of the boys’ yeshivos do not prepare them at all for the dating process or for marriage. How can I,...Read More
Question: I was wondering what the panelists feel about what I think to be a worthless and time-consuming practice of calling the friends of singles in shidduchim. Don’t people understand that every boy you call about is going to be “a huge masmid, who still has a lot of friends.” Of course, “he has tons...Read More
Question: I am writing this question an hour after returning from a first date. Twenty minutes after I dropped the girl off, my parents received a phone call from the shadchan. The girl is not interested in going on a second date. At least I was worth twenty minutes. I’m fine with that. I’m more...Read More
Question: The standard reply the shadchan gives when the girl says “yes” is, “She had a great time and she wants to go out again.” Now, who on the planet has a good time sitting with a stranger (from the other gender) for three hours, over a cup of flat Diet Coke (and water, of...Read More
Question: I recently went out with a fantastic boy, but something shocking happened on the date. Unbeknownst to me, he had his friend set off a smoke bomb in the hotel parking lot during the date, as we were returning to our car. He feigned concern and said, alarmingly, that apparently his car was going...Read More
Question: I was redd to a boy and we were given a no. Later, the shadchan gave the boy’s side a picture of me and they gave a yes. I was very turned off. My résumé wasn’t good enough for them and whatever info they found out wasn’t good enough for them, but now that...Read More
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